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Caught

No picture makes you want to say "Oh Shit!" like this one...

9 Things The Non-Tech Savvy Do That Annoy Geeks

I came across this on Digg.com. It's off a mirror because the original source went down due to digg effect. So, I copied the article here. It's awesome. I've experience so many of these things.

Posted by Sebconn at 3:59 pm

When you’re a tech nerd working or living with the not so tech savvy, there are a few things they tend to do that make you bite your tongue, and resist the urgh to take over what they’re doing and get it done yourself. They may be trivial, but they are all oh so wrong.

1: Microsoft Word is the application for everything.

Some people have been using the basics of MS Word since Windows 3.1, and have never wanted or needed to learn to use anything else, but they seem to think that Word is for full desktop publishing, database management and photo printing. They may even have the full suite of Office with Publisher and Access, but no matter what the task, Word will do it. Taking the long route seems to be the way to go, for example in order to print a picture, launch a new Word document, insert a text box, then insert the photo, you can then move the picture around and resize it to whatever size you like, which brings us to the next itch.

2: Incorrect Aspect Ratios.

Whether it’s on a new Widescreen TV, resizing photos in Word (of course), or using soome spyware riddled DVD ripper to rip a movie, some people just seem to have no concept of aspect ratio, they don’t seem to mind if Captain Jack Sparrow looks George Costanza with a pirate hat. The amount of bars and pubs that have gone all out to buy their plasma/lcd TVs to hang on the wall, only to run the footy in standard analog stretch to fit nastiness astounds me. Try as you might to explain 16:9 and 4:3 views, the problem continues.

3: Everything Must Be Double Clicked.

It’s quite hard to explain to a not-so computer literate person the difference between icons, buttons and links. They sit there happily browsing the internet double clicking on all the links like they’ve had too much coffee, it’s a habit that cannot be broken, you can tell them as many times as you like that you needn’t click like crazy to view that video on Youtube, but they will continue with their clicky ways.

4: Getting a faster computer will speed up the internets.

Off to the closest Harvey Norman to pick up the top of the line HP Desktop with all the trimmings, they hand over all their cash, take it home and get there 13 year old son to plug it in. Then you get the phone call or chance meeting where they question you on why the internet is still slow as buggery, even with this fancy new computer. “What type of connection do you have” you ask them, so naturally they tell you their ISP (Usually Bigpond, or AOL for the US readers), you slowly explain what you mean by your initial question, and 15 minutes later come to the conclusion that they have dial-up. You try and hold it back, but you can’t, you just cry.

5: I won a trip to the Bahamas!

No, no you didn’t

6: Your desktop wallpaper is NOT your screensaver.

I’m not quite sure how word got around that a desktop wallpaper is the same thing as a screensaver, but so many people seem to get the two mixed up. They can be talking about the background on their phone, or the background on their computer, they keep calling it a screensaver, why? I don’t know how this spread around the non-tech savvy world but it needs to stop, before my eyes start twitching and my head explodes.

7: NO, I DON’T want to fix your cousin’s brother’s uncle’s 10 year old computer.

This one is talked about a lot, hell there’s even t-shirts about it, but it needs to be said. If you’re a tech-savvy person, especially if it’s what you do as a job, people seem to think that you enjoy, and are happy to fix their computer. It’s true, yes we do enjoy a little bit of tinkering every now and then, but it’s a hell of a lot more fun when it’s your own machine, for a start the only person you can piss off is yourself if you manage to screw up, and on top of that, it’s YOUR computer so YOU get the benefits of the upgrade/maintenance. old computers are a bitch, working with old technology (unless it’s 1980s retro) is a bitch, and we don’t like doing it for free. I have no problem doing it for immediate family, and very close friends, but I do not want to get a tech support call from a work colleague’s boyfriend at 8:30 on a Saturday morning (that actually happened to me I might add).

8: The Non-Tech Savvy Geek

There are breeds of human out there who are convinced they are super tech gurus, they’ve sussed out Microsoft Office, and they can program a VCR with their eyes closed, and to top it off, they can talk for hours about stuff they know nothing about, using words they don’t understand. These guys are annoying as hell, and they are dangerous too. If you work with one, they can mess up a whole morning’s work at the blink of an eye. And even more annoying, they always give the other non-tech savvy people false hope, by telling them something is possible when it’s absolutely not, then you cop the bad wrap because you can’t do what they were told was possible. “No I can’t configure your phone to charge via bluetooth”

9: Why can’t I open this file on my floppy disk?

This one isn’t super common but it’s definitely happened to me a few times. Some people store all their important documents on a floppy disk, arguably one of the most unstable storage methods available bar writing the binary data in sand on a beach. So surely they have backup yes? No, no they don’t, you express sympathy on the outside, but really, you’re shaking your head muttering “you complete idiot”

Yes this list is pretty self righteous, a mechanic or farmer could write a similar list directed at people who know bugger all about their profession, and they probably would, but they can’t work out how to turn on their computer.

Bo meal time

Well, hello. It's been a while since I posted, so I thought I'd drop in. I posted a video to YouTube as an experiment. Let me know how it looks.

Mmm. Siberia.

The next time you want to complain about the cold, check out these pictures...


English Russia Website

Never Question a Drunk

Funny joke that came my way:

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket, where she selected:

A half-gallon of 2% milk,
A carton of eggs,
A quart of orange juice,
A head of romaine lettuce,
A 2 lb. can of coffee, And
a 1 lb. package of bacon.

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.

While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single." The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know what, you're absolutely correct, but how on earth did you know that?"

The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."

Best Joke of the Year.......

The following joke was emailed to me:

A Somali arrives in Minneapolis as a new immigrant to the United
States. He stops the first person he sees walking down the street
and says, "Thank you Mr. American for letting me in this country,
giving me housing, food stamps, free medical care, and free
education!"

The passerby says, "You are mistaken, I am Mexican."

The man goes on and encounters another passerby. "Thank you for
having such a beautiful country here in America!"

The person says, "I not American, I Vietnamese."

The new arrival walks further, and the next person he sees he stops,
shakes his hand and says, "Thank you for the wonderful America!"

That person puts up his hand and says, "I am from Middle East, I am
not American!"

He finally sees a nice lady and asks, "Are you an American?"

She says, "No, I am from Russia!"

Puzzled, he asks her, "Where are all the Americans?"

The Russian lady checks her watch and says..."Probably at work."

Of course, it was cute. It got a chuckle out of me. However, one might respond by saying that, if you go back far enough, aren't we all immigrants from somewhere?

Never leave your kids unattended with a gallon of paint...

iLife

OK, so am I an Apple Fanboi now. Maybe. Check this out:

iLife Video

Name the dog...

Monica's a good plan...

This is what they should do to all smokers!

Smoker Gets Extinguished - video powered by Metacafe

Ice Storm in Switzerland

Check out these cool photos. (no pun intended)

Ice Storm in Switzerland

Urine Test

Someone forwarded this test to me. Again, I'm not sure where it came from, but the author's right. If a person has to pass a urine test to get a welfare check, there'd be lots of people out there whose habits we'd no longer have to support. Check it out:

LETTER FROM A FARM KID, NOW AT SAN DIEGO MARINE CORPS RECRUITMENT CENTER

Got this email. Don't know where it came from, but it's pretty funny.

******************************
LETTER FROM A FARM KID, NOW AT SAN DIEGO MARINE CORPS RECRUITMENT CENTER

Dear Ma and Pa, I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother
Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell
them to join up quick before all of the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m.
but I am getting so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt and Elmer all you do
before breakfast is smooth your cot, and shine some things. No hogs to
slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically
nothing! Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there's warm water.

Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon,
etc. but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie
and other regular! food, but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the
two city boys that live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you til
noon when you get fed again. It's no wonder these city boys can't walk
much.

We go on "route marches", which the platoon sergeant says are long walks
to harden us. If he thinks so, it's not my place to tell him different. A
"route march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city
guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks.

The country is nice but awful flat. The Sergeant is like a school teacher
He nags a lot. The Captain is like the school board. Majors and Colonels
just ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.

This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals
for shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk
head and don't move, and it ain't shooting at you like the Higgett boys at
home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You
don't even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes. Then we have what
they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle with them city
boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real easy. It ain't
like fighting with that ole bull at home. I'm about the best they got in
this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake. I only beat him
once. He joined up the same time as me, but I'm only 5'6" and 130 pounds
and he's 6'8" and near 300 pounds dry. Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to
hurry and join before other fellers get onto this setup and come
stampeding in.



Your loving daughter,

Gail
******************************

What are we

Here, this is related to my previous post. Interesting perspective.

Why do people believe in God?

I found an interesting article on this topic. I don't know this guy's background, but his questions and assertions made me stop and think. I can see that I've fallen into at least a few of the traps he identified.

Some examples of his assertions:

• there's something we can't explain, so God must have done it.
• the world seems to complex and beautiful to have come into existence by chance
• you're afraid of death and want to believe that death is not the end

This list goes on and some of the items are quite intriguing. You can see the whole article here. If you're so inclined, the comments at the bottom of the article attempt to counter his arguments in favor of faith, although I don't subscribe to any of the ones I read.

Praying Mantis Eats Hummingbird

This is unbelievable. A mantis snags a hummingbird in mid-flight.

Link to article

"...this hungry mantis captured and killed a hummingbird not much smaller than itself. The mantis used its spiny left foreleg to impale the hummingbird through the chest while leaving his right leg free.

"We surmised that the mantis ran the hummer through and dangled its full weight on its foreleg while he consumed the flesh of the hummingbird from the abdomen. After he had his fill, the mantis gave his foreleg several swift jerks and freed his leg."

You know, I found one of these in the yard once and picked it up. It's an ominous looking bug. I guess I had no idea how right I was. Don't think I'll be holding too many more of these things.

Aliens at O'Hare

Jury's still out on this. I don't know what to think. But this is an interesting story. Many people saw the same thing. Question is what they saw, though.

Check out the article from whiotv.com out of Dayton:

UFO At O'Hare? Some Pilots Think So

These witnesses are ramp workers, managers and pilots. They're not a bunch of crackpots from the hills of Virginia or Kentucky.

I firmly believe that we're not alone. However, I also have to subscribe to the school of thought that if any being anywhere had the technology to travel the distances necessary to reach us, they'd be so far advanced of us that they probably wouldn't care to see us. (Think stepping on an ant).

However, as we have entomologists who are very interested in the insect part of our world and its impact in our lives, I suspect that there is some subset of an alien culture that would have an interest in us from a research perspective. How do we impact their lives, or are we related in some way? We could be of interest from an archaeological standpoint.

On the other hand, considering what must be the immense technological advantage they would have over us, you'd think that one of two things would occur:
1. They don't want us to know they're there, in which case, one might think they'd be better at hiding themselves than what we've seen to date
2. They want to visit, in which case they'd have landed at terminal C3 and posed for photos (dancing with employees perhaps).

Saddam Hussein is dead... :-D

Here's video of the hanging. WARNING: It shows the drop. If you don't want to see the actual hanging, don't watch this video.


Saddam Hanging Real Deal - video powered by Metacafe